THE COMPARISON GAME: JUST BEING ME!

For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise. 2 Corinthians 10:12

Do you play the comparing game like I do? It goes something like this:

I wish I could . . .
look like her.
act like her.
write like her.
be organized like her.
be calm like her.
have a following like her.
have her creativity.
have a ministry like hers.
have her personality.
have her confidence.
have her energy. (That’s a huge one for me!)
have her _________ (fill in your blank).

It’s a dumb game.
It’s stupid.
It’s pointless.
It’s wrong.
It’s discouraging.
It’s poison.

And, above all that, it’s unwinnable.

Why do I do it? Why do I compare myself with others? I know better. But I still do it.

Even if I don’t admit to the actual thoughts, I find myself trying to imitate the actions of others. To “do it like so-n-so does it.”

Perhaps being like someone else makes me feel more accepted. To fit in. Perhaps it’s my pride. It’s definitely insecurity and covetousness.

But none of these qualify as a good reason.

Comparison is a common human tendency. And we do it in both directions: I’m glad I’m not as bad as Person A, but, I wish I were as successful as Person B. Both stances are inconsequential. Comparing and contrasting myself to any other person is essentially another way to focus on myself. That’s not good.

God never called me to be like any other person. You have your strengths and weaknesses, and I have mine. It’s the way we were created. And it’s okay. It’s on purpose that we are different.

My aim in life ought not to be the best “you” I can be, but rather, the best “me” I can be!

I look back to my early parenting days, when I wanted my children to see a perfect role model of womanhood and mother. Perhaps a “Christian June Cleaver,” of sorts. Have I outgrown that tendency yet? Afraid not. Honestly, I have to be careful not to compare myself to our children’s in-laws now. We are us: we are not them.

I know God gave me the perfect children. Not as in perfect children, but perfect for me. Who needed me – even when I failed to be like other wonderful mothers I saw or fell short of my idealized expectations for the perfect mother. I believe when I admitted to and worked through my failures, I portrayed a realistic picture of how to deal with the failures and disappointments life would inevitably bring into my children’s lives some day.

As just plain Linda, I am loved. In Christ, I am accepted. As His unique creation, I am made for a purpose – specifically created with both needs and gifts. The needs keep me dependent upon Him, and the gifts allow me to bring Him glory in my special way.

Uniqueness creates individuality in stature, color, personality, talents, and opinions. How sweet to know I was shaped piece by piece, cell by cell, from God’s heart, mind, and hand. Every single part of me has His divine stamp of approval. From my nose to my toes, from the inside out, from my birthdate to my graduation to Glory: I am Me.

But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. Galatians 6:4

Certainly there are parts of me I like more than other parts. Some I can (and sometimes should) change and some I cannot (and should not) change. But how I use the me I am – (That feels like a Dr. Seuss line!) – is my character. It acts as my testimony. It can be my gift back to God. And He can help me do my very best.

I regret to admit how much time I waste wishing I were different. Contemplating both who I am and who I’m not. Wanting to be more like some of you and less like me.

But when I do that, I’m insinuating that God He made a mistake when He made me . . . me. God made me, not perfect, but perfectly. He made me short. He made me shy. He made me goal-oriented. He made grammar easy for me and math hard. He made me utterly directionally dysfunctional. He made me a writer, a teacher, a wife, mother, and Mimi. He created me young and has allowed me to grow old. He gives me endless ideas but limited energy. He gave me both needs and strengths.

Woe unto him that striveth with his Maker! Let the potsherd strive with the potsherds of the earth. Shall the clay say to him that fashioneth it, What makest thou? or thy work, He hath no hands? Isaiah 45:9

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Psalm 139:14,15

He did it for me. He made me to need Him to be the best me.

I will cry unto God most high; unto God that performeth all things for me. Psalm 57:2

And He did it for Himself, for His purpose and glory.

I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him. Isaiah 43:7

All things were created by him, and for him. Colossians 1:16

He gave me the perfect pattern to follow. When God measures me, He doesn’t put me in one side of the scale and you in the other. He puts Jesus in the other side. And Jesus is going to win in the measuring game every time. Neither you nor anyone else will be the yardstick by which I’m measured. Jesus is who I’m working to measure up to.

Putting my focus on Him rather than on myself or anyone else will keep my goals in proper perspective. I will always have work to do in my quest for Christlikeness. And He will constantly offer to help me.

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps. I Peter 2:21

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. Philippians 4:11

To be like Jesus, To be like Jesus.
All I ask, to be like Him.
All thru life’s journey from earth to glory,
All I ask, to be like Him.

To love like Jesus, to love like Jesus.
All I ask, to love like Him.
All thru life’s journey from earth to glory,
All I ask, to love like Him.

To pray like Jesus, to pray like Jesus.
All I ask, to pray like Him.
All thru life’s journey from earth to glory,
All I ask, to pray like Him.

To serve like Jesus, to serve like Jesus.
All I ask, to serve like Him.
All thru life’s journey from earth to glory,
All I ask, to serve like Him.

Heavenly Father, thank You for making me Linda. I am Your unique creation for Your purpose and my good. Please keep me content with my weaknesses and humble in my strengths. Help me be more like Jesus in my words, thoughts, and actions today. Amen